As your baby will be born after 1 December 2003 you will automatically have parental responsibility with the mother providing you are registered as the father on the birth certificate. In order to be registered as the father, you have to attend the registration of the birth with the mother (which must take place within 42 days of the birth).

As an alternative you may enter into a Parental Responsibility Agreement, which is a formal agreement in a standard form available from most County Courts or from the Court Service website at www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk.  After completing the form together you both attend your local County Court to lodge it, taking with you documentation to prove your identity (it's a good idea to check with your local court what documentation they like to see before you go).

If your partner will not agree to this, then you will only be able to obtain parental responsibility by obtaining an order of the court. This is usually a straightforward application which the court staff will help you to make, although it's always a good idea to take legal advice first.

Sharing parental responsibility can be very important in relation to a child because it means that the natural mother (who automatically has parental responsibility by giving birth) cannot make important decisions about the welfare of the child unilaterally. Parental responsibility is described as being all the rights, duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which by law a parent has in relation to a child and his or her property. In essence, this means that all the important decisions regarding a child such as medical care, religion and education are shared. The day-to-day decisions concerning a child, however, don't form part of parental responsibility but can be exercised by anyone 'in loco parentis' (e.g. when a child can eat and what time he or she should go to bed, etc.)

Sharing parental responsibility also means that you have to be consulted and give your agreement to your child being taken out of the jurisdiction of England and Wales. This can be very important  when the natural mother has links abroad since if your consent to the move abroad is not obtained, you can immediately apply under the Child Abduction Act 1984 for the return of the child to the UK and, generally, you will be successful (there are limited defences only available to such an application).

Further good news about parental responsibility is that it does not bring with it the more onerous responsibilities that having a child creates, such as the responsibility of maintaining the child. You will have these anyway even without parental responsibility!

Happy parenting!

Philippa Pearson is the author of 'Unmarried Couples and the Law' and the 'DIY Separation & Divorce Kit', both published by Lawpack Publishing. She specialises in all aspects of family law and is a member of the SFLA National Committee, the Lord Chancellor's Ancillary Relief Advisory Group and the SFLA Law Reform Committee. She practices as a solicitor at Norris and Miles solicitors in Tenbury Wells, a firm specialising in family, private client, conveyancing and company law, as well as commercial and civil litigation. She also writes and lectures on many aspects of family law.

Further information
Your parental rights as an unmarried couple
Buy Philippa's Unmarried Couples and the Law book
Buy Lawpack's Cohabitation Agreement Form Pack